Over the years, human relations and social interactions have revealed that current decisions are made mainly in reference to past experiences. There is a saying that experience is the best teacher; whether your own experience or that of someone closer. Hence, it’s logical to want to make decisions based on previous experience. But do you know that this can be a two-edged sword? By now you are wondering where I am going with this write-up. Hold on and give me a minute to let me shed some light on it.
The truth is most people do not look at things holistically but in abstract. Maybe it’s human nature or how our brains work. In the cause of an encounter, our minds become centered on the main cause or thing that didn’t go well. We tend to focus on that thing for future decision making. For instance, coming out of a relationship devoid of attention and care, you might jump at the next person that comes around willing to give attention and care forgetting all other factors needed for a successful relationship. A person who has been cheated on or betrayed tends to see every other person as a potential cheat. Even if they are able to start a new relationship, their partner will have to deal with a lot of insecurities and trust issues.
In a family setting, you will realize that people tend to focus on things they lacked or missed growing up. The truth is when you lack something (affection, knowledge, ideas, financial resources) in your past, you tend to fall for anybody or anything that gives it in your present. The availability of that thing does not guarantee that it will be good for you. The possibility that the person/thing fulfilling your current gratification may not be right or be able to sustain your future is very high, however, because you are getting satisfied today or in your present circumstance, you allow it.
The past is to equip your present and not to control it. Most people lose amazing opportunities and networks only because they encounter situations and people that reflect something from their past. It is not entirely bad to reflect on your past. Stocktaking of your life is very necessary for progress. However, your past is to help you learn and mold your today, not control your present decisions. If you don’t learn from them, you will keep making decisions that will generate the same results from your past. However, if you learn from them, you tailor your decision-making to getting better results in your present and future. Don’t destroy the joy of your present and future because of the pains from the past. Make decisions looking at situations from a holistic point of view and not just based on pains and failures from your past.
It’s a new year and time to take new steps, make new decisions, and come up with ideas. As you embark on this growth journey, reflect and decide on what is worth carrying with you this new year. Decide which baggage you must drop so you can have room for new stuff. Always remember that sometimes your old needs to crumble up to pave way for the new.
Kindly leave your thoughts, comments, and feedback regarding our post. Also, feel free to share your growth journey with us. Your story might be that motivation someone needs.
#Let’s grow together #JoG #steps every day #motivation #inspiration
